Primal Hunger

Max was wide awake the very moment that he opened his eyes. He immediately leapt out of bed and rushed to wash up and brush his teeth. Most of the time this wouldn’t have been normal behavior for the high school student. Typically he would roll over, pulling the bedspread over his head, and resist getting up until his mother started nagging him to get out of bed. However, this was the morning of October 31st and, over the past few years, he’d been noticing changes in himself as Halloween, or Samhain, approached. The first year he’d noticed it, it wasn’t anything more than an increased altertness, even antsiness. He wasn’t able to figure out the reason for the feelings of agitation. However, they subsided fairly rapidly after Halloween was over and his memory of them faded. But they came back again the following Halloween, and they were stronger than the first year. He also became aware of sharper sensory perception, particularly the sense of smell. Once again, though, he quickly forgot about them after the holiday had passed.

On the third year, there was a new development that shocked him. He couldn’t quite articulate the new sensation even to himself. It was as if something, or some new facet of himself, was awakening deep down within his very being. It felt like there was some sort of primitive consciousness deep down in his basal ganglia or limbic system that was starting to stretch and assert itself. This primeval, even savage, presence seemed to be an autonomous entity, although, at the same time, it felt like an integral part of himself. As had been the case on the previous years, his senses had been amplified, even more than before. But the sense of smell, in particular, had grown much more acute.

An especially salient instance of how advanced his olfactory sensitivity had become occurred when he was in the showers after gym class. All that day, he’d felt practically assaulted by the wave of scents that was washing over him. However, in the showers, he detected one aroma more strongly than any others. Cutting through the clean smell of soap, there was another smell that he found curiously arousing. At first he couldn’t figure out what it reminded him of. Then, when another boy walked past him, he sensed a subtle increase in that smell, which brought back a memory. When he was several years younger, his family had gone on a trip to France for vacation. He remembered once having bought a ham sandwich from a sidewalk vendor. Not knowing the language, and not being aware that uncooked pork was safe in Europe, he unwittingly had selected a raw ham sandwich. At first, he thought the surprisingly strong, almost spicy, flavor was due to some condiment in the sandwich. When he realized the meat was raw, he spat it out and wouldn’t finish eating.

The aroma he was detecting now from the naked boys crowded together in the showers was surprisingly similar to that smell, and taste, of raw ham. This time, however, he found the smell exhilarating and his appetite was stimulated. This was followed by the realization that the boys surrounding him actually were, in fact, made up of raw meat, practically the same as the ham in that sandwich. Instead of repelling him, that realization was surprisingly arousing. As he gazed at his gym classmates, observing how their muscles flexed under the skin as they stretched or how their butt cheeks jiggled as they walked, he could feel the muscles in his arms and legs get tense, in readiness to spring into action. When he walked close by another boy, his fingers suddenly clenched in an instinctive impulse to grab him, for what purpose he didn’t quite understand yet. Max controlled himself, however. At that time, he still didn’t have any idea what he would have done if he had, in fact, seized the boy.

The year after that, his senses had been heightened even more. By the time Halloween had arrived, his sense of smell had become so acute that he was able to identify individual boys, even when they were out of sight, by each boy’s own specific smell. He found that some boys’ scents incited his urge to pounce more strongly than others. Among several classmates who elicited the strongest reactions was Liam. He didn’t know Liam very well. Being in some of the same classes, they were acquaintances and would casually chat now and then, but they didn’t really hang out with each other. However, now his primeval side was asserting itself once again. The instinctive impulse to literally pounce on him, along with a few other boys whose scents drew him the most strongly, was threatening to overwhelm his self-control to such an extent that he was afraid of doing something embarrassing when attending gym class. However, when he was close to Liam, or one of the other boys, he couldn’t resist taking a deep breath and savoring the enticing aroma of raw ham. He’d picture himself in his mind, grappling Liam and pulling him to the ground, but still didn’t have a clear idea as to what he’d do next, once Liam had been subdued.

This October 31st, his primeval self had already been gaining strength for several days. So, he actually had been anticipating this heightened alertness, amplified senses and increased nervous energy. He managed to get through his school day keeping his impulses under strict control. Nevertheless, he had a difficult time paying attention to any of his classes, as his mind was distracted by images of himself being in pursuit of some, as yet unspecified, prey. On his walk home afterward, he nearly lost control. A young man in sweats, probably in his mid-twenties, happened to jog past him. The now familiar smell of raw ham getting closer had drawn his attention before the guy had passed him, so he wasn’t taken by surprise. However, he wasn’t expecting the reflexive reaction that would be elicited in him by the sight of the jogger. Just as a cat will instinctively spring into action at the mere sight of a mouse scurrying past it, the moment the guy jogged by, Max reflexively started sprinting after him, before he even had time to realize what he was doing. It took an enormous effort of will for Max to stop himself from tackling the jogger. The guy kept running, although he looked back over his shoulder at Max, with a startled expression on his face. Max could only stand and sheepishly avert his eyes, out of embarrassment.

That evening, Max decided it would be better to stay in his room. So, while his parents were handing out food to trick-or-treaters, he lay in bed watching old Vincent Price movies on cable. Still, the primeval entity stirring in his being had grown so strong that it was threatening to take him over altogether. Not being able concentrate on the television, he got up and started restlessly pacing back and forth in his room, like a big cat in its cage. Every muscle in his body was tensed in preparation for action, while the sounds of the trick-or-treaters outside continually incited him to escape from his self-imposed confinement and find some release for the energy that had built up inside him. Finally, he heard the doorbell ring and the cry of “Trick or treat!” for the last time. Shortly thereafter, he heard his parents wish him a good night before heading off to bed. Once he was certain that they’d gone to sleep, he couldn’t contain himself any longer. He silently slipped out the back door and headed out into the night, with its promise of the fulfillment of his deeply felt needs.

As soon as he’d stepped out the door, his senses were assailed by a plethora of sensations. They’d never been as strong and acute as now. He was surprised that his night vision was also better than it had ever been. But, once again, it was his sense of smell that had been enhanced the most. He paused for a moment to take in the congeries of aromas that were being presented to his attention. He could identify the damp, decaying smell of fallen leaves, mixed with the heady aroma of the cold ground underneath. He was able to detect the sugary smell of candy lingering from earlier that evening, along with the smell of beer from a party several blocks away.

Of course, he was also able to distinguish the smells of people, mostly partygoers, who were still out and about that late at night. It was a mixture of the distinctive aromas of each individual. He felt drawn to approach one or other of them, although he was still unclear as to what he’d do. All he knew was that he simply had to track down the one that was closest to him. Then he stopped and sniffed. He recognized one of the individual smells, among all the other ones. Since the senses of smell and taste are closely related, he could even taste it as well, which only excited him even more. Pulled irresistibly, he reflexively picked up his pace and followed the distant scent, like a hunter tracing its quarry. After several blocks, he was able to follow the appetizing, specific smell of raw ham to its source in an alley behind a commercial building that was closed for the night. Max peered cautiously around the corner and there he was.

Liam was standing in the poorly lit alley, next to an SUV with its back door standing open. He was occupied in moving some objects from the SUV to one of the dumpsters standing there. Unable to hold back any longer, Max stepped into the alley and began stealthily moving toward Liam, while images of Liam’s body in the school showers filled his memory. He breathed in the delectable scent of Liam’s flesh and reflexively licked his lips. At the sound of his footsteps, Liam turned around and waved at him.

“Hey, Max. What are you up to tonight?”

Max didn’t answer. Completely surrendering to his instincts, rather than just walking up to Liam, he was moving rather slowly, as if he was stalking Liam. His mouth was starting to water in anticipation.

“You missed the fun. A couple of us guys just TP’d principal Wilson’s house. It was awesome. Now I’ve got to get rid of the evidence before taking the car back home.”

Liam picked up an empty carton of toilet paper and tossed it into the dumpster. When he turned back to the car, he was surprised that Max had moved in so that he was only a foot away, staring him in the face. Liam was rather unnerved by the intent expression on Max’s face and made as if to step back. At the same time, Max’s attention was concentrated on Liam’s soft, vulnerable throat.

“Dude … don’t start getting gay on me, okay?”

Without saying anything, Max leaned closer, with his eyes closed, and breathed in deeply, savoring Liam’s aroma. Angrily, Liam shoved Max away.

“I said …. unh!”

The shove had triggered a reflexive response from Max. Without even thinking about what he was doing, he automatically pushed back, knocking Liam off balance so that he landed on his back in the rear of the SUV, with his legs dangling over the edge. Immediately, Max leapt on top of him, pinning him to the floor, and reflexively closed his mouth over Liam’s throat before he could make another sound. Liam started twisting around beneath him and beating him on his back, in a panicky attempt to break free. With a strength he never knew he had, Max pressed his full weight on top of Liam, actually enjoying the sensation of the body struggling beneath him. He succeeded in pinning Liam’s arms against his sides, although Liam continued kicking ineffectively.

For the first time in ages, Max felt like he was doing what he had always been meant to do. He was a predator and it was only natural for him to be here subduing the victim writhing in his embrace, with his jaws clenched firmly on its throat. And, in his view, it apparently was only natural for Liam, as prey, to be there squirming haplessly in his grip. As Liam continued struggling, although more feebly, Max tightened his jaws even more around Liam’s throat, cutting off his oxygen. Finally, Liam’s body went limp. This only heightened Max’s excitement. He hastily snapped his jaws shut all the way, tearing off a mouthful of meat.

At first, Max was surprised at himself. He’d never dreamed that he’d be able to bite off flesh with his own teeth. However, he soon started chewing on Liam’s flavorful, raw meat. It was even more tasty than the smell had suggested. He looked down at Liam lying just beneath him. Leaning down, he brushed Liam’s bangs from his face and licked his cheek. This only whetted his appetite all the more. No one was likely to enter the alley before dawn, but, just to be sure, Max picked Liam up and placed him on the ground behind the dumpsters. Now he felt like he could take his time and fully enjoy his meal, made all the more satisfying by the fact that he had caught it himself.

He knelt down next to Liam and lifted his hoodie up to expose the torso. Then he leaned over to sink his teeth into the smooth skin of Liam’s side and bite off another hunk of meat and gulp it down. After a few more bites, he rolled Liam over onto his belly and pulled his jeans down, revealing the boxer briefs stretched over his nicely rounded ass. Max’s appetite was still so strong that he nearly tried to bite through the cloth of the briefs to get at the flesh beneath, but ended up sliding them down for greater convenience. Then he grabbed as much of one of the cheeks as he could get into his mouth and bit it off. Chewing contentedly, he’d never felt so fulfilled in his life.

As the night progressed, Max continued devouring Liam’s meat. Occasionally, when he started feeling too full, he’d stop and rest for a while, before resuming his feast. At one point, when he reached the bone, he felt a desire to get at the delicious marrow inside. However, although he seemed to have a distant memory of the primitive presence being able to bite through bone, that proved to be too much for his teeth. So he went back to ripping off pieces of meat. Eventually, however, a faint lightening of the darkness on the horizon indicated that dawn was approaching and it was time to leave, even though he hadn’t succeeded in eating the whole thing. He took some pieces and wrapped them in Liam’s hoodie, to take home so he could finish them off later. Then he tossed the remaining pieces in the dumpster. He paused to lick Liam’s cheek one more time before biting it off and dropping the head in the dumpster as well. Then he headed cautiously home, still chewing on Liam’s cheek.

When he arrived, Max opened the back door open a crack and peered in. Luckily, his parents weren’t up yet. As quietly as possible, Max snuck through the house to his room. It was only after he’d shut the door behind him that he realized that his clothes were stained with blood. He’d have to dump them somewhere when he had time to. After he’d undressed, he hid the clothes in the closet. Then he stashed the hoodie with the last remnants of Liam’s flesh under his bed and climbed under the covers. He immediately fell into a deep, satisfied sleep.

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“Max!! Get up! It’s time to go to school!”

Max groaned.

“Leave me alone! I’m not feeling okay.”

That wasn’t a lie. Eating that much meat in such a short time was leaving him feeling bloated and sick to the stomach.

His mother came in and looked him over. He did appear to be genuinely unwell, so Max was allowed to call in sick that day. He spent the day lying in bed. He claimed to have lost his appetite, so his presence wasn’t required at meals. However, his lack of appetite was because he was periodically gorging himself with Liam’s meat that he had taken home with him. Although the presence of the primeval entity had started fading, it was still strong enough so that he was still capable of consuming the raw flesh.

The following morning, he was feeling a bit more like his normal self. So, he figured he might as well go to school as usual. After washing and getting dressed, he headed to the kitchen where his mother was fixing breakfast. The television was on to the local news.

“And now for more about the human remains found behind Baxter Hardware Store on Halloween night. The victim has been identified as 17-year-old Liam Farro. As reported earlier, it appeared that he’d been torn apart by a wild animal. However, there’s been a startling new development in the case. Police forensics has confirmed that the bite marks were those of human teeth, not some carnivore’s. We’ll keep you updated with any further developments.”

Max sat down as his mother placed his breakfast in front of him. It was a plate of ham and eggs. Max cut off a piece and held it up on his fork, grimacing with distaste at the flavorless, dried-out meat. He couldn’t help but compare it with Liam’s richly flavored, juicy raw flesh. In his estimation, his mother had totally ruined the flavor by subjecting the ham to the drying out of the cooking process. Still, the presence deep within him had almost completely faded away by now. It would be twelve whole months before he’d be able to fill himself to repletion again. He sighed resignedly. At Max’s age, an entire year seems like such an eternity, when you’re waiting for the next time to satisfy your deepest hunger.